A Hesitant Smile...

As tough as it may have been, and may be still, a hesitant smile so gracefully lands on thirsty lips.

Just a smile, nothing more, nothing less.

A forgotten treat, a not-so-guilty pleasure, just a smile...

Her face wonders, the eyes squint, while the muscles struggle to adapt... What is going on? They demand to know!

An inner sigh of brief relief... Followed by a voice, shouting out to the world, her inner world, to come out and dance... Scaring the tears away... If just for a while...

Just a smile... Sometimes that is the only thing we truly miss yet we don't realize its absence until it visits once again...

The Unforgivables...

"Forgiveness is a virtue of the brave".~Indira Gandhi

Her soul is tired from carrying around all this deeply entrenched pain and dreadful memories of a voice so harsh, of a word so humiliating, of an act so unkind, of a look so hollow, of a love never returned and of a promise so unfulfilled.

In her mind she stumbles with the thoughts passing by of the places she had been, the people she had met, the chaos she had undergone...

Somewhere inside of her existence, she feels she needs to forgive. She needs to be brave and allow all this pain to wither away with forgiveness...

Yet, she knows, she can not forgive what she can not forget; as long as the wound is fresh, it will keep bleeding and though the past is the past, it did not heal yet with the help of the poking and the scratching that "all of them" impose!

The unsettled childhood, the messed up teenage years, the love which was never appreciated, the things she had lost, the nights she had cried, the pain which she endured alone, the longing for a warm touch on the face, the yearning for a sincere embrace... All of these and many more, deeply rooted somewhere she can't reach to pull out or even trim!

Would you mind telling her: How could she forgive the uncalled for pain? How could she find it in her heart to refrain herself from HATING or HURTING those who placed her in the corner of despair, intentionally?

كلمات مبعثرة

أضاءت النجوم ليلها ولكن عتم وحدتها أظّل على ذلك الضوء

أشعلت كلماته نيران مشاعرها ولكن أمطار أحزانها أطفئت تلك النيران

حرك النسيم أحاسيسها الكامنة ولكن بروده حضنها

أبطئت تلك الحركة

لم تزل تؤمن بوطن و حضن و مرسى و أمان قريب
لم تزل تبحث في العيون السود عن حبيب
لكن الوقت يداهم قلبها الذي بات من الحب معدوم

و الزمن يسابق حنانها الذي هو نفسه منها محروم