Forgive Me, If You Can...

Image By: Beirut

Forgive me, if you can:

For the engendered pain oozing from my weary face,
And the dormant rage leaking from my sleepy eyes...
For the times I let you down and lose my subtle grace,
And the constant fear, hesitations and erupting sighs...

Forgive me, if you can:

And I really wish you would, sooner than later I guess,
I am growing into my skin, which barely fits me anymore!
For the longest time I have been in such a terrible mess,
That I can't help but fear a big fall after a love's soar!

Forgive me, if you can:

I can't seem to get over the bulk of sadness I so stupidly wore,
I can't seem to stop my mind from anticipating more pain!
I find myself wrapped up in the past's slime from head to core,
I really, truly, sincerely can't handle getting hurt once again!

The Unforgivables...

"Forgiveness is a virtue of the brave".~Indira Gandhi

Her soul is tired from carrying around all this deeply entrenched pain and dreadful memories of a voice so harsh, of a word so humiliating, of an act so unkind, of a look so hollow, of a love never returned and of a promise so unfulfilled.

In her mind she stumbles with the thoughts passing by of the places she had been, the people she had met, the chaos she had undergone...

Somewhere inside of her existence, she feels she needs to forgive. She needs to be brave and allow all this pain to wither away with forgiveness...

Yet, she knows, she can not forgive what she can not forget; as long as the wound is fresh, it will keep bleeding and though the past is the past, it did not heal yet with the help of the poking and the scratching that "all of them" impose!

The unsettled childhood, the messed up teenage years, the love which was never appreciated, the things she had lost, the nights she had cried, the pain which she endured alone, the longing for a warm touch on the face, the yearning for a sincere embrace... All of these and many more, deeply rooted somewhere she can't reach to pull out or even trim!

Would you mind telling her: How could she forgive the uncalled for pain? How could she find it in her heart to refrain herself from HATING or HURTING those who placed her in the corner of despair, intentionally?

This Shall Not Pass...

January 4th, 2009

You played my heart like a pendulum; up and down you played,
You sold my love for cheap, as the pain inside me swayed!

You broke my soul to pieces; to fractures you shattered my soul,
You strangled my hopes with wounding words and stood laughing through it all!

You crossed the lines too many times; all the lines I drew you crossed,
Accusing, demanding, eluding and faking, and my emotions you bossed!

But this shall not pass…
I’m not the one you use…
Yeah, this will not pass…
My heart you will no longer abuse…
No, this shall not pass…
This time I will turn around…
No, this shall not pass…
Don’t try to speak, don’t utter a sound…

I tried so hard to tell you, I begged you to listen to what I have to say:
“My love to you is very strong yet you’re crumbling it all away!”

I held on to you tightly; tightly I held on as your thrones cut me deep,
A beautiful flower of a kind you were; one which was hard to keep!

I inhaled my sorrow and sips of your venom in my veins I soaked in,
I watched myself hinder away, I saw you stare, I saw you grin!

But this shall not pass…
It’s like calling me by her name…
Yeah, this will not pass…
I know I’m the one to blame…
No, this shall not pass…
This masquerade must stop…
No, this shall not pass…
Before you grip me to the last drop…