It is safe to say that life could be summarized by a set of roads leading to certain outcomes, which are, consequently, more roads!
Today, an unexpected reaction to an encounter, forced me think of those roads again, and of all those turns I've taken that lead to the road that I am currently on.
Somehow, the events of today made more impact on me than any other gut wrenching events that I have experienced lately and all those "ifs" and "maybes" came crashing down on me like hot meatballs in a spaghetti bowl!
And although I'd like to consider myself wise enough to let go of what could have been and try to deal with what is, I am unable to move past the fact that I seem to have taken so many wrong turns which have left me on a road that only leads to thorns and thunderstorms, of the heart and soul.
In a way, I feel responsible for this end, for where I am. On the other hand, I bitterly hold it against many people out there; those who have been reasons for many of my stops, sudden breaks and unplanned detours.
I just wish it didn't hurt this bad, or feel this painful. I just wish that my heart wasn't ripping away double time in my chest.
Somehow, I feel like the world is made of glass and I'm right at the edge of the only hard solid seat in the house. If I fall, my whole life will shatter into pieces. But I just keep slipping...