I am not the kind of girl who really believes in superficial things such as horoscopes but my love horoscope today was really interesting and it inspired me to write… So here it goes…
A few months back, I used to be a firm believer in love, its manifestations and the many different ways one could express the love he/she had…
I used to spend hours creatively crafting a piece of writing, a small hand-made gift, a funny colorful card to express the love I had for a certain friend, boyfriend or family member… I used to stay up late thinking of ways to make those I loved happy and more comfortable with their lives and who they are… Seeing those I loved smile used to mean the world to me; it used to put me in high spirits and bring me inner peace and serenity…
Lately, things have changed… I now feel that that river of love which I carried deep inside of me has finally run dry and I can't help but wonder: Who's to blame?
Someone once said: You shall reap what you sow… This means that everything that happens to you is a result of your own actions… Well, I guess this may be true but not in the matters of the heart; not when it comes down to love and emotions…
When love, giving, caring, sacrificing and devoting is at play I rather use another idiom of my own: You shall reap what others sow!
Sadly enough, the bad experiences of love which end up in pain or betrayal or that simply come to an unexplained ending, they change us, make us someone we do not know and do not really understand… They build a wall around us to shield us from more pain and betrayal… We then are not what we want to be because someone else decided to leave, cheat or hurt us… It not a choice rather a sentence that someone condemned us to…
For now… I rest my case…
Good night!
A few months back, I used to be a firm believer in love, its manifestations and the many different ways one could express the love he/she had…
I used to spend hours creatively crafting a piece of writing, a small hand-made gift, a funny colorful card to express the love I had for a certain friend, boyfriend or family member… I used to stay up late thinking of ways to make those I loved happy and more comfortable with their lives and who they are… Seeing those I loved smile used to mean the world to me; it used to put me in high spirits and bring me inner peace and serenity…
Lately, things have changed… I now feel that that river of love which I carried deep inside of me has finally run dry and I can't help but wonder: Who's to blame?
Someone once said: You shall reap what you sow… This means that everything that happens to you is a result of your own actions… Well, I guess this may be true but not in the matters of the heart; not when it comes down to love and emotions…
When love, giving, caring, sacrificing and devoting is at play I rather use another idiom of my own: You shall reap what others sow!
Sadly enough, the bad experiences of love which end up in pain or betrayal or that simply come to an unexplained ending, they change us, make us someone we do not know and do not really understand… They build a wall around us to shield us from more pain and betrayal… We then are not what we want to be because someone else decided to leave, cheat or hurt us… It not a choice rather a sentence that someone condemned us to…
For now… I rest my case…
Good night!
3 comments:
Good morning,
You have spoken the right word and explained the right process.
The Wall and the Love both things to one result an existential one as you've described it even before this post (refer the Pictures on a Wall)
Unfortunately, when the experience of love has ended, those who have been in know what I am talking about, start a new experience: Therapy (and not the common doctor one)
Self-Therapy, or how our psyche re-adapt itself to the newborn person we have turned to, or like getting up from a dream or nightmare.
If just words could explain how it happens. The Wall, a manifestation of the person's rigidity holding down a nervous/mental breakdown.
During the relationship, love was the wall that we don't see because it's painted to the person's face that we love. When it ends, you feel amputated, not like "before".
A decisive statement have to be taken though, should I let myself go, should I act as I am the same and the bad experience didn't CHANGE me? or should I believe and keep the adventure going on but the difference is that I am in control now?
These questions are the basics questions. The Consciousness (a big word close to illusion) becomes perverted yet everything happening happens so calmly, after that, you ask yourself too,
Me who was ready to become the Other (the loved person), and the Other (friends and all whom we care about) whom I was his/her emotional/moral foundation,
How could I not lose this?
Once you talked about not bending some basic principles for the others loved person in your post.
It could be a start.
What the loved reaped what you sow all your life in that unfaithful matter, you wish that it does him good in his life, selflessness is the word and the action,
you blow a wish in the air for him/hers to continue the life while you know that you have changed forever, faith in what your core is could destroy the biggest of Walls.
M.
Thank u for your comment "M"...
we all reap what we sow...
even in love and in everything...
sometimes we see the end from the begining but still, we try to do nice things and we fall in love and we sacrifice and we spend all day and night thinking of ways to make the one we love happy!! and yeah, he/she becomes happy because of what we did, but still, the end is still the same, and it was only a matter of time, so how can we blame people of what happens with us or of how we turned to be?!?!
we reap what we sow... cuz after all, we have no one else to blame but ourselves... we can't force people to love us or to even like us or decide to be with us!!
so from my point of view, i can't blame anyone or anything for my decisions and my actions and what i've done... cuz no one forced me to do them! and no one promised me anything, or any change!!
nice subject beebs
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